Read decided to persue her. He decided to persue her to the exclusion of everyone else. He would discourage entreaties from other ladies. He was all in with her.
He wrote in his journal on that day about this decision. “My crush on jenny was simply an infatuation. I am sure it is more. I know that she is not there yet. I am there. I am ok with that. I am willing to be patient. I am hopeful that one day i can catch her. ” he said.
Jennifer was not thinking that way. She suspected he like her. She figured that it would pass. She decided that if she backed off and waited him out he would move on.
She did like him. She was not yet interested in him for a romantic relationship but she respect him. She wished him the best. She wanted him to have a good life. She hoped that he did find an acceptable wife. She hoped that he would have a family.
The first Sunday after he made the deciaion to persue jennafer, Allison approach him. “Hello read. “She said.”hello alison. ” he answered. He walked away.
She went up to him. “Look i was hoping that we could get together sometime outside the church. ” alison commented. “Allison i dont see us as a potential couple. I believe that either The Lord has closed this door or he has never opened it. I would ask you to pursure this no futher. ” he told allison.
Allison was taken aback. She understood that he was fully convinced not to undertake this. He was asking her in the strongest manor he could for her to back off. She did not like it but she concluded that she had to hornor his wishes.
“Alright. I am sorry to brother you.” she told him. The two dispersed. She would never again try to get his intention in that manner.
Jennafer came in. Jenn saw them together. She thought mayby something was going to develep between them. She was hoping that he would.
He saw her and went over to her. “Hi jenny. ” he said. “So any prospects of a relationship between you and Allison? ” jeny said. He was quite taken aback by that. He was saddened to hear her say that or to Even think it.
“Allison is interested in me but i have discouraged it. ” he told her. “Why? ” jenny asked. “I feel so strongly that i cannot even entertain that thought. There is no possibility of it. ” he said.
“You are an assistant and youth pastor. You are in a mentorship program. You cannot believe that you cannot marry or even date a member of this church?” she remarked.
“No you misunderstand me. I do believe that i can mary a sister in this church. I believe that the lord has made it clear that i cannot even consider a relationship with her. It is not his will. That is my only reason. ” he said.
“She is a fine girl. She would be a good fit for you. ” jenny said. “That door is closed. I really dont want to discuss it.” he told her. “Alright. I did not want to upset you. I am sorry. ” she said.
“Its fine. I am happy to leave any thoughts of her behind. I am not following the lords admonition begrudgingly. I am happy to follow it. The lord will not leave a decision like marriage to chance. I have prayed for the lord to reveal her. I am not going to try to force it. “He said.
He knew that she was not ready to hear that he knew she was the one. He tried to present himself to her without scaring her away. He wanted to be near her. He wanted her to get used to him in her life without intimidating her. She felt that he knew how to navigate this delicate balance that he had to maintain right now.
“I don’t want you to go against the lord’s will. You are a thoughtful man. You would not make a decision like this lightly. I never ment to question you. “She said.”i know that. ” he assured her. “I wont bring it up again. ” she said. “Its fine. ” he said.
He sat next to her during the service. She knew that he liked her. She wanted to downplay it. Ignore it until it went away and she was flattered. She might even entertain it.
there were a few roadblocks. first she found it hard to move pass her first husbend. she found it hard to totaly let him go. She found it hard to embrace read.
Then there was the other reason. Her incontinence. What would happen if he found out? She knew that he would become disinterested if he did.at least that was what she thought.
She wanted to run away. She wanted to push him away. She did not want to be hurt. She wanted him to go away. A part of her did not.
She had almost no blader control. He and her shared a hyimbook. He held her daughter in his lap. She pooped her diaper several times during the service. She peed as well.
She wanted to leave when the pastor ended the service. She wanted to get away form him. She could not beleve that he could not smell her. “I got to get going. Have a good day” she said.”you too” he said.
She gathered her kids. They headed home. She went upstairs. She pulled off her black skirt. She took off the half slip as well. She laid on a watterproof mat. She opened the diaper. She wipped herself off. She put on a fresh diaper. She put on a new slip and a new skirt a pink one.
She took a nap with her younger kids.she loved her children. They had a quick supper before church. She had a diaper change before she came to the evening service.
He saw her. He noticed she wore different cloths. He knew she usualy did. She realy wanted him to back off. She was not ready to push him away. She was not sure she could ever be romantically involved with him. She did vailure her friendship with him.
“Hi jenny. ” he said. “Hi read. ” she said. He sat next to her. “How was your afternoon. ” he asked. “Good. I got a nap in. More importantly the little munchins got a nap in. ” she said.”i did not. ” he said. “Pleaae tell me you were not playing video games? ” she asked. “No. I dont play video games. I am not against it i just dont. I was working on church stuf. ” he said. She chuckled. ” ok.” she said.
She had pee and pooped during the evening servive. It was not a great day in that regard. She looked froward to leaving. He wished that she did not jump out. He understood why she did but it was stil hard. He wanted to be with her all the time. He loved being with her.
He was falling for her more and more. He hoped that she was as well.he had no idea if she was or not.he was afraid to find out.
He missed her every time she left. His feelings for her seem to grow and grow. He hoped that he could convince her of that. He was not going to give up. Not at all.
When a singles banquet is held at the church, the pastors wife who is planing the event insist that Jennifer attends. She is reluctent but agrees. He agrees to come but does he realy hopes she comes.